Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Wet Taylor Lautner vs. Wet Xavier Samuel

Since wet, hot men are all the rage for Eclipse, I figured why not a little competition between two of the bigger contenders for the hearts of Team Edward? Thus, in a battle for sopping wet hotness to the brain death, it's wet Taylor Lautner vs. wet Xavier Samuel.

Contender 1: Taylor Lautner

taylor lautner

In this corner, we have Taylor Lautner, who beefed up his physique to ridiculous levels for his role as the rejected werewolf Jacob Black. Frankly, if he keeps running around like this, the defection levels from Team Cullen are going to hit crisis levels. Points in his favor include:
  • Playing that all-American sport, football
  • Winning smile
  • Total willingness to show it all off there in his semi-see-through white T-shirt
Points against him:
  • Jailbait status until February 11, 2010.
  • A chaperone who resembles Jabba the Hut (sorry Big Daddy, but, well . . . sorry!)
Contender 2: Xavier Samuel

xavier samuel

In this corner, we have Xavier Samuel, who has managed to convert a so-so career in Australia into an expanded Twilight experience. His moderate levels of resemblance to Mr. Cullen have been noted before along with remarks about the blogosphere's chatter on his sex-god status, but he has more to offer the Twination. Points in his favor include:
  • He's 25 (Xavier will be 26 December 10th) which makes him totally street legal in all 50 states
  • Shown here playing that all-Australian sport, surfing, he apparently made a whole movie, Newcastle, clad mainly in a wet suit. Win!
  • Hangs out chaperone-less and known to drink
Points against him:
  • Sings badly. Apparently uses said singing voice to annoy Rob by singing Miley Cyrus and Katie Perry at him. WTF? (Ashley Greene totally brought this up in an interview, btw)
  • Spends a lot of time hanging out with Bryce Dallas Howard and her husband/kid.
  • Australian, virtually unknown in the US
As I look over these, I'm not seeing a clear winner emerge. I mean, the whole underage thing works against Taylor, but then if any man croons Miley Cyrus at me I will probably kick him regardless of his hotness level. What are your thoughts?


  1. Xavier! Sorry but Taylor is ugly and I'm moreof an Xavier fan.

  2. Thanks for your comment! I'm way behind on my blogging . . . preparing a new post all about the things that are happening with Xavier Samuel now that he's Twilight famous (Eclipse is so huge for him!) that should go up in the next week or so.