Sunday, September 13, 2009

When Outfits Attack: Ashley Greene

Yay for the MTV VMAs! I missed the live feed so I have about 10 billion YouTube postings to catch up on, but fortunately there is plenty of time for my favorite awards show game: What the hell are you wearing?

Today's contestant is none other than VMA fashion correspondent Ashley Greene. Yes, we all know and love Ashley, and I may have counseled in the past that you don't be mean to Ashley Greene.

However, you don't be dressin' Ashley Greene in no stinkin' gold lamé skirt, either.

Exhibit A: The Horror

ashley greene

For shame! Who did this? You know she didn't get to dress herself. Most of the time when she dresses herself she looks pretty good.

Exhibit B: Personal Taste

ashley greene

And even though I thought the skirt here was a little special, too, at least it didn't make me want to gouge my eyes out.

Exhibit C: Past Choices


So basically what we have here is ample evidence that Ashley is a basically competent dresser, capable of not looking like something that escaped from the '80's just this afternoon. Which means I have to find someone and hit them for this.

Exhibit A: The Horror, Again, Because I'm Not Done

ashley greene

I would also like to have her ditch the shoes, that necklace, and whoever did her eye make-up. She looks good, but it's more like an outfit I would have expected on Kristen Stewart, especially after that punk spike skirt thing from the Teen Choice Awards.

For the record, I don't like the clutch she's holding, either. Shudders. Ashley, please, I count on you to be the cute one! Don't let this happen again.

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