Breaking Dawn Fever Spreads To South America

The upcoming release of the first installment of Breaking Dawn has spread to my corner of South America.  It's not just the posters and the promotional merchandise.  The kids in my high school ESL classes are actively planning to get their latest Edward & Bella fix.

Whether they will get to do it in a theater is a different kind of story.  Ecuador is not known for its strict copyright laws and knock-off DVD stores are a major part of the film industry here, such as it is.  Cuenca, a city of approximately 500,000 people, boasts more than 150 illegal DVD shops.  They operate as regular stores, closing up only when the government decides to get serious about their image.  A few days later they reopen and life moves on.

As a result, most of the Ecuadorian Twilight fans will be taking in the movie on the small screen.  At least the first time.  Based on their ability to quote lines from the movies, Twilight films get watched over and over and over.  The first purchase may be a ripped off DVD of a US film premier of Breaking Dawn, but a later viewing will likely happen in theaters, boosting Twilight's global box office numbers.  In the end, a fan is a fan, and we all buy too much Twilight stuff to be respectable.

The life-size Edward's in my local film store, for example, had to be bought from somewhere.  Twilight banners, promoting New Moon, Eclipse and the original are everywhere.  The original Twilight is not aging so well, I'll confess.  The sleeker, upgraded vampires are a better bet.  And here in Ecuador, the countdown to getting to see them take the screen for Breaking Dawn is officially down to the final days!

Is Taylor Lautner's Abduction a Victim of Bad Acting or Bad Editing?

Taylor Lautner's Abduction opened up today officially, and the general reaction has not been good.  Critics are giving it a firm thumbs-down in both the US and international press.  The general public isn't loving it either - for a while the film even had a 0% rating at RottenTomatoes.com!

Quick, let's get out before it starts!

So what makes Abduction such a bad movie?  Twilight haters are quick to give it a thumbs down, but most professional critics are focusing on two key areas:  Taylor Lautner's acting skills and the production work of the film.

• From the New York Times review of Abduction:  “To give Mr. Lautner his due, he is a martial-arts dervish with perfectly sculptured abs. His acting, however, is another matter. I can’t recall another teenage star so opaque. If his physiognomy — recessed eyes that don’t seem to focus, a wide snub nose and Elvis-y lips — conjure Neanderthal manhood after a cosmetic makeover, his boyish monotone with its utter lack of inflection suggests that he is really an advanced robot simulating human speech without registering emotion or even comprehension.” Ouch!

• “Abduction features woefully appalling writing brought to life by genuinely random direction. The only consistency is that none of it works, and the result is a mess that will leave even the most ardent Twi-hater yearning for Stephenie Meyer’s skills. …one of the year’s worst films," says Australia's Sydney Morning Herald.  Just in case it's not clear they're haters - the whole review calls the film "worse than Twilight."

•  Critic Claudia Puig for the USA Today review of Abduction wrote: “Lautner . . . has the physicality to star in an action thriller. But his acting range is limited. His face rarely changes expression.”  (Okay, I might give her this one.  Then again, name a facially expressive Twilight actor?  Anyone?)

• And again from Australia:  "Don’t be fooled by the presence of esteemed actors like Bello, Isaacs, Sigourney Weaver (playing Nathan’s shrink) and Alfred Molina (a dodgy CIA boss). They’re only there to collect a pay check for reading out the absurd script — which could have been written by a 14-year-old, given its level of depth and sophistication," says Movieflix.

So which is the true culprit here?

Tell me what's really going on here!

Though I will agree that it takes more than pretty abs to carry a movie, I'm going to lay more blame on the film production and cinematography crew than Taylor Lautner.  No, Taylor Lautner is not the world's best actor - but that doesn't mean he's a bad actor.  And we've all seen great movies carried by actors who were terrible in other films.  Look at Gwyneth Paltrow in Shakespeare in Love ... and then anything else.  Think how awesome Jude Law is in Sherlock Holmes.  It's not just about the actor ... it's also about the direction, camera work, script, and editing.

Abduction just doesn't cut it in those areas.  Casting choices were fine - there's heavy weights in there who can do much, much better.  However, the writing for the movie's script is crap, in the sense that it's not a tight, driving story.  Some of the lines make you cringe.  Chemistry is not developed evenly between characters, and there's a choppiness to it all that goes beyond using artistry to create a feeling of chaos in the film.  This just wasn't very well done.

Despite all that, Abduction may still be a profitable film.  Given the strength of Lautner's Twilight fame, he'll likely have other chances.  Perhaps his next movie won't be thrown together so badly, and we'll all have a chance to see him in a film directed and edited by a team who can help him show off his best side.

New Fan Fic: Just Show Me The Money, Money

It's official - my new new fan fiction story for Twilight is live on FanFiction.

Although she’s a little confused about the how of it all, there’s no confusing the what – Bella’s been vamped. Her new “family” is a set of first-class drug dealers in the middle of a turf war with “The Pack”. Coming to terms with her new life status, adjusting to her new family life, and managing to find a happy ending … you’d have to be high to think it’s going to be easy!

Check it out now:  http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7305226/1/

Kristen Stewart Reminds Me Of January Jones In W Magazine

Checking out Kristen Stewart's photo shoot for W Magazine, I couldn't help but be reminded of January Jones.  Blame it on seeing X Men First Class earlier this summer, but at first I didn't even think this was Kristen Steward at all.  I'm believing her in the Snow White gear better than in these shots, which just seem to make her look like someone else entirely.

The cover, looking wide-eyed and glam

With a red ring that I kind of want

With a very January Jones style mink

Not all of the Kristen Stewart go this far to alter her look, but this one really does it up.  I like the photos, but I just keep seeing January Jones

 

Anyone else seeing the resemblance?

Fun New Twilight Poster - Now With Unicorns!

This is going to be a short and simple post.  I saw this, I loved this, you need to see this gorgeous mash-up of My Little Pony and Twilight:

Many thanks for your genius, AMSLizrah